Tuesday, October 20, 2009

Sentinal


This old barn sits silently about 100 yards from the Hilliard bike trail, a part of the autumn landscape on a sunny October day. As I came upon it recently while rollerblading, it occurred to me that the barn has been one of the few unchanging characters here, probably for more than my lifetime. If its walls could speak, would they tell of days long gone, when trains used to make their way by, back when this was a rail line instead of the paved trail it now is? I can almost see the train cars, day and night, flying by when the barn was new and maybe painted red, hauling coal, cattle, or cars to far away places, a caboose the last sight as each train faded into the distance. Or perhaps the tale would be of corn and wheat spreading as far as one could see where now there are subdivisions with new homes, swing sets in the backyards and rose bushes where wildflowers used to grow. What was it like, before the roads were laid and the people came in great numbers, back when the sounds of the day were mostly birdsong or the rustle of the wind in the drying cornfields? Or when the lights at night came solely from the moon and stars?
Whenever I am out on my blades I always have music; moving in rhythm with different songs is dancing on wheels. But often I stop, as I did this day, to turn off the music and hear only the sounds of nature. Sometimes it isn't possible if a car goes by in the distance or a plane flies over. But as I stood, contemplating the changes this area has witnessed, all I could hear was the sound of the wind and the birds. And I wondered; when I am gone, will this old barn remember me too?

Sunday, October 18, 2009

All I need is my car and this potato masher

Kayden and Gramma had a sleepover last night, and boy did we have a good time! At almost 10 months, he is becoming a little person and it is priceless to be a part of his growing. Heidi, with a mother's foresight, brought along Kayden's wheels- this hot car with a horn! Our hardwood floors were the perfect surface for him to motor on, and he took advantage of the ideal driving conditions. And what would a night on the town in your new car be without...a potato masher??!! He peddled, Fred Flintstone-style, holding the masher aloft like a sword. Thankfully the cats ran for cover or they would have been roadkill for sure.

At around 10 PM, Kayden had a bath (with the masher) and I put him to bed, just as Mom instructed. Ha! Not so fast, Gramma. Apparently Kayden already heard that at Gramma's you get to stay up LATE and he was planning on that. I laid him down and he popped up. I tried to hold him sideways, like he used to prefer, and he cried more. So, we went in to Gramma's room, turned out the light and sat in the rocker. At first, he pointed at things in the dark, but Gramma was not feeling very chatty at 11:30 PM, so we just rocked. Soon, his head was starting to sway back and forth, and he finally fell asleep on my shoulder.






Sunday, October 4, 2009

Of Tears

And I know there'll be no more....Tears in heaven
~ Eric Clapton

Tears ~ How could we go on without them? There is a connection between the human heart and the flow of salty drops from our eyes that defies explanation. Both the greatest joy and the most piercing sorrow find expression in tears.
How unkind it would be to permit the intensity of feelings encountered in a lifetime without also providing the ability to weep!
I think of times in my life when happiness filled my heart and times when the pain of loss seemed more than I could bare; times of hearing beautiful music or seeing earth's loveliness; times, as well, of intense anger at injustice or cruelty. At each of these moments in my journey, I give thanks that my eyes knew how to weep, releasing emotions too great to be contained.